


this mess we've made

by bilexualclarke



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Infidelity, Season 5 spec, desperate fucking, i almost didn't add the ending but i had to
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-29
Updated: 2018-05-29
Packaged: 2019-05-15 18:34:24
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,638
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14795771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bilexualclarke/pseuds/bilexualclarke
Summary: Bellamy lets out a shaky breath. “Clarke, I was in love with you.”Deep down, some part of her knows this, but it still sends a shock through her system to hear him say it. “And now?” she asks, her voice trembling.“Clarke…” he says softly. He is leaning over her now, one arm on either side of her body. She licks her lips and his eyes darken as they follow the movement.“Bellamy…”This is wrong, the one decent part of her wants to say. I won’t ask this of you.But instead, she whispers, her voice ragged: “Please.”





	this mess we've made

The door slams shut behind them, the sharp clang of metal echoing in the silence. Clarke sighs, closing her eyes and rubbing her temples. They are in the same room she was in after being tortured by McCreary, the same room she was in when she got to touch Bellamy again for the first time in six years. Only this time, Bellamy wouldn’t be coming to get her out, because he was locked in there with her.

 

“I’m sorry,” Bellamy finally says, taking a seat on the long metal pallet and putting his head in his hands. “It was my idea to try to talk to them again.”

 

“Stop apologizing,” Clarke says, resting a hand on his shoulder. His skin is warm beneath the thin fabric of his shirt and she allows herself to enjoy it for a moment before taking her hand away. “I agreed to the plan. It’s not your fault that it didn’t work.”

 

She takes a seat next to him and he lifts his head. His hair is a mess, sticking up every which way and still managing to fall into his eyes. She brushes it out of his face before she can control herself, and his shocked expression brings fire to her cheeks. She looks away.

 

“Everyone knows we’re here. Someone will come for us.”

 

“And if they don’t?” Bellamy says, his voice a bit deeper than usual.

 

“Then we save ourselves, like always.”

* * *

The night wears on and they sit in silence. Clarke eventually lays down on the pallet, balling her jacket up to use as a pillow and curling onto her side. She notices the way Bellamy’s eyes linger on the exposed skin of her shoulders, the same way they did when they were in this room before. She had been too overwhelmed to say anything then, still not totally believing that he was real. She can’t say anything now, not after seeing the way he is with Echo, not after seeing that he’s moved on.

 

 _If he had moved on, he wouldn’t be looking at you like that_ , the nasty little voice in the back of her head taunts her.

 

Clarke forces her eyes shut and tells that voice to shut up. It works for a little bit, until Bellamy moves from his post on the far wall and comes to sit on the ground next to her, resting his back on the side of the pallet.

 

“Are we ever going to talk about it?” he says softly. Tears spring to her eyes without warning, and she is overwhelmingly thankful that her back is to him as she hurriedly blinks them away.

_Talk about what?_ she wants to say, wants to play dumb. But he would never believe her, so she steels herself and steadies her voice.

 

“Is there anything to talk about? Seems pretty cut and dry to me.”

 

“ _Clarke_.” He places a hand on her arm, his thumb automatically rubbing soothing circles on her skin. “Please look at me.”

 

She turns slowly, not meeting his eyes. “You don’t owe me an explanation, Bellamy. I understand.”

 

_I tried to call you every day for 2,199 days._

 

“I still feel like… It took a few years, Clarke. It didn’t just happen.”

 

_She tried to kill me. You. Your sister. She killed Gina._

 

“It doesn’t matter. You don’t have to justify yourself to me.”

 

“She was just doing what she thought she had to do.”

 

At that, she finally looks at him. “Trust me, of all things, that I can understand.”

 

“Then why can you barely look at me anymore?” Bellamy says, his voice tight.

 

“Because I was stupid enough to think you’d come back to me and everything would be the same, that we’d pick up right where we left off,” Clarke says brokenly. She finally looks up at him with watery eyes. “That the timing would finally be right for us.”

 

Bellamy lets out a shaky breath. “Clarke, I was in love with you.”

 

Deep down, some part of her knows this, but it still sends a shock through her system to hear him say it. “And now?” she asks, her voice trembling.

 

“Clarke…” he says softly. He is leaning over her now, one arm on either side of her body. She licks her lips and his eyes darken as they follow the movement.

 

“Bellamy…”

 

 _This is wrong_ , the one decent part of her wants to say. _I won’t ask this of you._

 

But instead, she whispers, her voice ragged: “ _Please_.”

 

And then the dam breaks. Their first kiss is everything and nothing like she expected. It’s hurried and messy and insistent and tender and everything that is _them_. Clarke settles on her back and there is enough room on the pallet for him to crowd over her, her legs locking around his waist. They know that there is no going back from this, that everything is going to change now and it will probably be a hell of a lot harder, but Clarke can’t bring herself to give a shit. She has spent six years waiting for him.

 

The initial stretch of him inside her is so overwhelming she almost comes then, so used to the feeling of her own fingers on her clit that being filled up in the way she has been craving for six years is nearly unbearable. From the way Bellamy’s eyes roll back to the litany of curses that leave his lips, she gathers he feels the same.

 

“Christ, Clarke,” Bellamy groans as he fucks into her. “Feels so good, baby. Your cunt’s so sweet to me, so fucking tight, _goddamn_.”

 

“Give it to me,” she whines. “Yes, Bellamy, _please_ give it to me. Harder, _harder_ , I need it. _Yesyesyesfuckyes_ …”

 

It’s too good, she can barely control herself. She can feel the wetness dripping from her cunt and down the crack of her ass, smearing all over her thighs. She can’t control the sounds escaping from her, even though she knows she should be quiet. From the look on Bellamy’s face, he wants her to be as loud as possible, but who knows who from Eligius could be listening. He gives her his fingers to quiet her, two of them heavy on her tongue, and she sucks them like she would his cock. God, she wants it, she wants to feel him in her mouth and in her throat, she wants to gag on his cock and taste his cum and watch his beautiful face as she does it all.

 

Clarke could never get off with penetration alone, always needed a little bit of love on her clit to get her there, but she feels her orgasm building already. She claws at his lower back, pulling him closer, deeper inside her. Her moans take on a new pitch, higher and needier, and when he bottoms out she bites down on his fingers.

 

“Fuck,” he swears, “look at you. So fucking wet and desperate for my cock. You needed this, didn’t you, baby?”

 

He removes his fingers from her mouth so she can answer, sliding them down her body to land a few mean slaps on her clit that make her whole body jolt.

 

“I needed you,” she pants, so wrecked that she doesn’t care how much she is giving away. “I needed _you_ , Bellamy.”

 

“Yeah, yeah you fucking did, baby,” he growls, gripping her face and kissing her deeply. “I’m here now. I’m not leaving you again, no matter what.”

 

Clarke winds his fingers through his hair and clutches him close. Those words are dangerous and the implication drives her closer to the edge. “I’m gonna come, Bell,” she whispers, hiding her face in the crook of his neck. He isn’t having it, pulling back and wrapping his hand around her throat, putting just enough pressure on the sides to thrill her.

 

“Look at me,” he demands. A bead of sweat drips off the bridge of his nose and onto her lower lip. He steals it back with a heated kiss. “Look at me and come.”

 

It’s a struggle to keep her eyes open as the waves of pleasure rock through her, but she does, desperate to drink in as much of him as she can. He goes to pull his hand away but she grips his wrist to keep it there. She wants to have bruises tomorrow, to have evidence of his hands on her. When she comes it’s with a high-pitched keen, her legs shaking and cunt pulsating around him, trying to bring him deeper. His answering moan vibrates through her core as his hot cum spills inside of her. She wraps her legs tighter around his back, never wanting to let him go.

 

He has to pull out eventually, and when he does it’s like a bucket of cold water has been dumped over them. Dread and guilt creeps through Clarke’s veins, and those feelings mixed with her lingering pleasure create a dull throb of shame. Before she can speak, the sound of footsteps startles them both. They jump to their feet, hurriedly redressing before the door swings open.

 

One of Diyoza’s men is on the other side, one hand holding the door open and the other wrapped around a machine gun. At his side is Echo, relief palpable on her face when she sees them both alive. She rushes into the room and jumps into Bellamy’s arms.

 

“Your girlfriend seems to be quite the negotiator,” the man says to Bellamy. Echo pulls back and looks to Clarke.

 

“Your mother had an idea,” she says, eyes alight with excitement.

 

Clarke can feel Bellamy’s cum start to drip out of her cunt, and she forces a smile back at Echo. Bellamy’s eyes burn the side of her face, but she refuses to look at him. “Lead the way,” she says.

**Author's Note:**

> if you feel like talking, I'm on tumblr as [bilexualclarke](bilexualclarke.tumblr.com)


End file.
